Monthly Archives: January, 2013

PYB Meeting: January 16, 2013

[I try to keep a composition notebook as somewhat of a journal, but I figure I should start posting my experiences here.]

I think I had my smallest turnout ever today— a total of 6 young bros showed up—which is cool because I’ve had groups as large as 20-25 and with me being the only adult it was extremely difficult to manage (and feed) them all at one time.  Smaller groups are more intimate.  We usually begin the meetings with just frolicking around.  We talk about the latest in sports news or we joke around with one another.  I may go around the room and ask questions about girlfriends, crushes, problems at school or home, just random things.  I don’t know if this is apropos or not, but to me, it lets me get to know them on a more personal level, and it also helps them to get to know me a little more as well, almost as “one of the boys” type of guy.  Again, many may disagree but I think it helps kids relate to me and become more comfortable with me.

Today’s theme was a continuation of our initial communication exercises that we began back in November.  I tried to give them a lot of practice speaking to a large group using the 30-second impromptu speech game which turned out to be a lot of fun, by the way.  The objective now is to continue to build off those skills learned, and what better way to do that than to begin teaching the art of debate?  I opened our session with a clip from the movie, The Great Debaters, and we discussed effective communication skills observed as well as other characteristics that make a good debater.

Then, I showed them a clip of one of my favorite educators, Salaam Thomas El, author of I Choose to Stay, on FOX News debating two of the biggest members of the hip-hop community at the time, Cam’Ron and Damon Dash.  The debate centered on the impact of rap
music on young, inner city kids.  Since this is a very poor example of a good debate because of Cam’Ron’s poor etiquette and untrained street antics, and of course, Bill O’Reilly’s nonsense, I felt this would be a great clip to juxtapose with The Great Debaters so they
could get a better grasp of effective and ineffective communication.

Due to time constraints, I didn’t get the opportunity to give them a little “hands-on” activity with debating where I actually “teach” them, so I decided I’d save that activity for next week.  So in the end, I wrapped it up with a reminder that poise is one of the greatest strengths in your interpersonal relationships, and further, in debating.  I stressed the importance of controlling one’s anger for the smooth flow of rational thought and decision-making.  As effective debaters should have poise as one of their greatest strengths, so do men, especially African-American men.  All in all, it was an ok day, but I could’ve been a little more prepared since the whole theme for the day didn’t come to me until the day came.  It should’ve been planned out a little better, but I’m still happy with the day’s outcome.


The Most Disrespectful, Misogynistic, Dehumanizing, Inglorious Rap Songs that Black Women Love!

Remember Don Imus?  The radio talk show host who came under a lot of public scrutiny for referring to Rutgers University Womens’ Basketball team as “nappy-headed hoes”?  No surprise here that the Black community was in a frenzy: the NAACP got involved; we called for his job; it was the talk of the town in barbershops and hair salons on every Martin Luther King St. in the country.   What angered us most was Imus’ response after the incident: “”That phrase [nappy-headed ho] didn’t originate in the White Community. That phrase originated in the Black community. Young Black women all through that society are demeaned and disparaged and disrespected by their own Black men, and they are called that name in Black hip hop.”  Can you believe that?  Imus blames his outburst and racist mischaracterization on rap music! Since when has rap ever—and I mean EVER—disrespected Black women?

Well, here’s a look at some of the most disrespectful, misogynistic rap tunes directed towards women that Black women especially love (but if you’re white and even remotely treat a woman like this, you’ll get punched, kicked, cursed, eye-rolled, neck rolled, get called “boo boo”,  a call from the NAACP and possibly be on the chopping block for your suspension or termination from your job, and maybe a lawsuit). Gotta love double standards, huh? And yea, I know the songs make you want to dance and shake your booty–Nothing wrong with that.  There’s nothing like a good song to dance to and talks to you like a piece of s*** at the same time.

I call this list the Most Disrespectful, Misogynistic, Dehumanizing, Inglorious, Make You Subconsciously Hate Yourself and then Getting Mad when the General Public Thinks You’re Really a Hoe Rap Songs that Black Women Absolutely Love List:

(I really tried to rank these according to ratchetness but each was so disturbingly deplorable that it made it practically impossible. I gave it my best shot. Take the time to glance through the lyrics)

1.  Gucci Mane—Ima Dogg

This has got to be the absolute worst song directed towards Black women in the history of all history.

2. Ying Yang Twinz—Whisper Song

Click here for lyrics—>

I never was a fan of Ying Yangs Twinz, therefore, I never paid too much attention to their music; that is, until I decided to write this blog post. I read the first verse and the hook, turned my computer, got in the bed and went to sleep. I’m contemplating completely moving to country music now.

3. Lil Jon & the EastSide Boys feat. The Ying Yang Twinz–Get Low

This song is surely to get the club jumping.  I included it on my list when I heard my daughter singing along to it when she was playing Dance Central 3 on the Xbox 360 Kinect.  I know she didn’t what she was saying, but I’ll be damned if she shakes her booty to that song again.

4.  Any song by Too Short:

Have you heard any of his songs? Wel,, if you have, ’nuff said.

5.  Any song by 2 Live Crew

Put on a 2 Live Crew song around any Black woman—hood chick, college girl, church girl—and watch her go ape s***.

6.  Plies—Becky

Rappers come up with the most interesting words for sexual innuendos, huh?

7.  Nelly–Tip Drill

I think the video says it all. Take a look, see.

8.  Webbie—Gimme Dat

Ok, I admit, I used to love this song, but them something happened.  I realized I had daughters.

9. Dr. Dre—B****es Ain’t Shit  and Snoop Dogg “Aint No Fun”

I put these songs together because every Black male and female who grew up in the 90s can rap these songs verbatim.  As I explained to the young brothas in my program, these songs basically “taught” me how I should treat women.  I hate to admit that but it’s the candid truth.  I used that story to illustrate a point—hiphop music definitely does influence our thoughts and actions especially when we’re not mature enough to understand those meanings and the sheer fact that its purely entertainment, not a way of life.

10.  Tupac—I Get Around

Posthumous Pac is remembered as some neo-Black Panther, a reincarnation of Huey Newton and the whole Black Power Movement manifested into a thugged, tatted up rapper.  Let’s not forget that Tupac, like just about every other rapper, definitely played more than his fair share of degrading our Black women.


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